its that time of the month...(2.0)

...where i actually write something! sorry i've been scarce on here... sometimes i struggle to come up with ideas to appeal to the very wide range of readers on here... it almost paraliyzes me with not knowing what direction to take this- back when i just knew i had 2 people reading it was a little different--

So its really late- and I don't guarantee any of this to be grammatically correct or coherent… !

Ok- so I’ve been working on a blog about rotation for the last week- but I don't really even know if that’s what you guys want to hear about or not- I know that sounds funny… “of course we do Scott!”- but I mean- nobody else really talks about their work days in detail- I mean- I think there are some really cool things happening that I might comment on- but I’ll hold off on the “here’s what I do in detail” thing… just suffice to say- its really different than grey’s anatomy- or House – or ER or whatever it is you watch--- and by really different- I mean the MDs really like pharmacists a lot and I’ve made several cool doctor friends just from giving them advice on drugs and stuff- its been- in a two word phrase- “really sweet”… I would have thought from watching all these TV shows about hospital atmospheres that all doctors were stuck up jerks who didn’t want input from anyone else- but that couldn’t be further from the truth! They REALLY seem to get that “pharmacists know drugs” and they use us like crazy… I was just sitting in morning report at 7:30am 2 days ago- and this Doctor turns to me and tells me: “hey man- we just found budding yeast in this guy’s feces- we were thinking on sending him out on fluconazole—what dose do you think would be good and how long should we treat him?” and I was just really flattered… and this other guy was sending someone home who had hypertension, diabetes, and high cholesterol- and he just asked me to sit with him and figure out what meds we should send him home on… “whats a good dose for this?... so you think a calcium channel blocker would be a good idea?”… I just love that stuff- its really refreshing to get some r.e.s.p.e.c.t. you know what I mean? And these guys really are smart- the MDs- like I have so much respect for what they are doing- they’re just awesome—actually, Josh, I was gonna ask if you knew this one guy- Bryan- he got his degree in civil engineering from UTK and worked for a year and then decided to go back to med school… you might have been a freshman when he was like a Jr or something… I don't know how tightly knit your classes were?... I’ll try to get a last name for you—everybody just wants to go by their first names- its really refreshing. I feel like I’ve learned SO SO MUCH in the last 2 weeks- its been extremely fast paced and challenging… every night we’ve got papers to read and things to research to report on the next day… I am such a big fan of this learning style. You tell me there’s a test in 2 months? I’ll wait until a week before and cram… you tell me I have to present tomorrow on the appropriate rate of lowering blood pressure in a hypertensive emergency or urgency- you better believe I’m gonna go home and figure it out! I just love a good challenge- I always have- I can get complacent pretty quickly- but there’s no time to get bored on this thing and I dig that…

What else? On a personal note? Most people want to hear about that part anyways….

Well- I’ve made some new friends since school has gotten started-----and that’s been good... one girl in particular, but i've come to realize over the last few days that i haven't made the same impact on her that she made on me- maybe i can help her decide between some of the other guys whose cuteness she's made me aware of? it was probably a bad idea from the get-go.- but i'm cool- only 9 more months in memphis, right?

I bought 50 more lbs for my weight set- so I’m curling 70ish and benching about 40 lbs more than I had been… I can’t really tell if anything is different- actually I’ve been SO busy these last 3 days that I haven’t worked out and it feels lousy! I actually wonder at all how people who do the full-time thing (that I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing this month) make time to work out?? Its hard… and when you DO get the time- you’d rather just watch a movie or something…

Today at the pharmacy was HORRIBLE—easily the most stressful day I’ve had since I’ve been in Memphis- they wanted me to work the 8am-4pm shift today (Saturday)… I mean… I was already really tired from all the “be at the hospital for morning rounds at 7:30am” thing this week—bleh… I mean—again—I love a good challenge but this was bad… I didn’t leave the pharmacy the entire day- never even to go to the bathroom- or get a drink- or something to eat- it was just non-stop the second I walked in the door… THESE days I really come home and think “I can’t do retail- this is just so horrible”… I don’t know how to explain it to you guys- you deal with a bunch of nice people- but JUST as many angry and hateful ones… and that’s hard for me because I take it personally and feel bad- and apologize… I really do my best to be sincere- In terms of me growing up- today was great- as these kinds of days usually are- I did a good bit of counseling- and telling people “no”.. that’s one of the hardest parts for me! Aryan knows a good inside joke about me- but its really kind of true- I have a hard time saying “no” to anyone- 4 days early on your controlled prescription? I WANT to give it to you- I can see that you are in pain and that’s the last thing I want! I want you to feel good! Pain is really hard!- but… I can’t fill that for you today- its against the law- and if you’ve been taking them like they were prescribed to you- you’d have 17 more tablets left… I can’t do anything for you…. The JOB makes you tell people no! I used to always just let the pharmacists do the hard part- but I’ve started to take some of it myself just to get practice… I actually told 2 people today that I couldn’t fill their prescriptions or give them any free pills… I mean I’ve done that before- but this felt different- I was really taking responsibility for the answer instead of just informing them that “the pharmacist says you can’t _____” … but long story short- we were really under-staffed and I came home exhausted- covered in sweat- and really… kind of… bitter and angry… I mean I work with a guy who has a bit of an anger problem- and honestly I can see how if you let it get to you after a few years how you might be kind of angry all the time…

And I felt kind of bad that I couldn’t teach this girl how to do the job right… but she didn’t know the answer to things such as “ok- what’s 24 divided by 4?” trying to lead her to the appropriate days supply of a prescription written for 30 tablets with the directions “1 to 2 every 4 to 6 hours as needed for pain”… how many days would you give that? Well… it’s always in favor of the patient- i.e.- the minimum amount of time 30 tablets would last if they took it as often and as much as possible (I.e. 2 every 4 hours)- its REALLY not hard math at all- but I had to kind of give her more basic tasks to do while I entered prescriptions to try to keep our ship afloat all day- we were just walking such a fine line between “really backed up” and “too far behind to catch up by the end of the day”… like… I’m not trying to be vein- but if I had taken a 15 minute break- things would have exploded- it was that bad- it would have just been the pharmacist and the aforementioned technical school student… I know they need someone from 4pm-midnight tomorrow but I just can’t- I mean maybe last weekend- but I’ve got a presentation due Tuesday… I feel bad leaving them out to dry though… it’s a tough call- because I KNOW what its like being understaffed and that’s what’s gonna happen tomorrow-