Tribulation

well things didnt work out how i planned. It turns out I was one half of a letter grade from a 3.0. I had a 76.5 average in BCMB 402 with a class average of 72.3... anyone guess what letter grade you think that should be? I would like to think that is deserving of a B... but its not... C+. What does that mean for me? I dont know. I'm going to work through this and try to explain myself to the pharmacy people. I also plan to tell them that I will get A's in my two classes this summer- If they can wait and average my first A with my last semester it will still give me over a 3.0 and because they probably wont be calling people on the list till august anyways, that will probably be Ok... thats all i can think to do. I was pretty down about this last night. I felt like all my work these past 2 months to improve my grades was for nothing... there were feelings of the world not being fair (and it's not), of me not being able to control my own life... but hey- that was last night... you guys know me better than that. I KNOW that the last two months of school i worked my butt off... i dont think anyone but Mandy really knows because she is the only one that really got a day-by-day accounting of the amount of studying i did (feel free to comment on that, Mandy) I failed my Advanced Genetics Lab (BCMB 403) midterm with a score of 43%... the next lowest grade on that test was a 73%... i also failed my first of 3 quizzes...once i got the ultimatum i worked really hard, got perfect scores on two big presentations, and i got an A on the final which all pulled me up from failing to a B... in my sociology class i failed the midterm with a 62% score... (yeah... i was in much need of motivation)... after the ultimatum i got a 100% on my 9 page research paper on health care (which she really loved because get this- she had a masters in Health Education- and was also a nurse for 10 years before getting her PhD in sociology-coincidence? i think not.)- and a 100% on my 10 minute presentation of that paper to the class... i also studied for many many hours and earned a high B on the final (which was way above her low class average)- those factors together pulled me up to within 1 point of a B+ which i was able to talk myself into (still very glad she was a health-person for a lot of her life)... in Advanced Cell Biology I failed the first test with a score of 64% (the average was 66%- but i still failed it).... i pulled my act together when i heard about what i had to do and got two perfect scores on our 35 minute group presentations (i spoke for 20 minutes of the latter presentation) and got a B on the final... with his curve that pulled me up to a B+ and 2.1 points away from an A (which he has set at a 94!!!)... I know it might not sound great, but i got a C in organic chemistry- second semester... that doesnt sound great but i know people who were taking it for the 3rd time and still told me they were going to fall short of a C... so i do feel proud of myself in a way... but I WAS SO CLOSE to getting the C! Thats it, though... I am not giving up, on the contrary- I'm throwing down the gauntlet--- from now on, I'm not going to have to "come from behind" because i am going to stay on top of things and make sure i do well from the get-go... in 10 years i will be at a pharmacy working as the pharmacist and i will look back at this time in my life and say either "i got in my first year after undergrad, or i had to wait a year before i got in"... thats the only think that is unsure to me at this time. I will never give up on this. Thank you all for all your prayers and support- please keep it comming for just one more week or so while i enter into deliberations with pharmacy school as to how they will treat my 2.9 semester average insteat of the 3.0 they wanted... i hope they like playing horse-shoes and or hand-grenades

(those being the only times when close counts)